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Creating Your Own Personal Reality

July 2, 2012

I recently posted this guest blog on I hope you enjoy it!

Creating Your Own Personal Reality

If you have ever been through a personal crisis and headed off to therapy for help, then you may have spent some time considering, What is Normal?

That’s how it was for me, at least.

Crisis Mode

Growing up, I had always been Miss Perfect. But after a series of life changes, I just couldn’t do it anymore. With a break up, a job change, a move across the country, and the separation of my adoptive parents, when I got the opportunity to reunite with my birth mom—I was not passing it up!

Unfortunately, it was a little too much for my brain to handle. When my uncle passed in the Twin Towers, the tension that had been building exploded. While everyone proudly believed I was fulfilling a lifelong dream to dance, I insanely thought I was a spy for the Illuminati who unwittingly perpetrated 9/11.


After a brief hospital stay, and some heavy anti-psychotic medication, I was left figure out how to put the pieces of my life back together. The psychiatrist said that I’d had a bipolar episode. Maybe I was bipolar, maybe not. If I had another breakdown, it would be worse, and then we would definitely know that I was bipolar.

If I was going to regain my sanity, find any happiness or even just contentment, I would have to define my own personal reality going forward. And, I’d have to stay away from the spy delusions.

I knew I didn’t want to fit into a regimented role of perfect wife and perfect mother. I didn’t want to be reined in at all times by the confines of my strict religious upbringing. I didn’t want to be controlled by the negative thought processes that had plagued me for most of my young adult life.

Discovering My Personal Reality

With the help of a psychologist trained in cognitive therapy, I defined “normal” on my own terms. That’s not to say I didn’t take responsibility for my actions, or live as a law-abiding citizen. It simply meant that I no longer had to live my life according to what I felt others wanted me to do, how others wanted me to look, or how others wanted me to be.

To ask myself what I wanted out of my own life was an eye-opening experience. To realize that I no longer had to feel guilty for going with my gut was freeing. To reach for what I wanted to achieve, on my own terms, well, that was what made me happy.

Do you feel confined by your negative thoughts? Are you ready to make a change in how you live your life? How do you define happiness? How have you created your own personal reality? I’d love to hear what you think!

I’m so happy to be guest blogging today on A Secret for You! Post a comment below, or connect with me online.

Laura Dennis currently lives in Serbia with her husband and two children. Her harrowing 9/11 memoir, ADOPTED REALITY, is now available on and

Learn more about me at

Follow my blog, adoptedrealitymemoir

Like Adopted Reality on Facebook

Tweet with me @adoptedreality

Or just send me a plain-old email, laura @


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